Heeding Advice from Your “Best Friend”

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In June I began writing a monthly article for Ann Quasman’s Woman Talk Live. Her site is one of my favorites–an online community designed “To give women everywhere a bigger voice and a platform for growing, celebrating and living more fully.” The topics in Ann’s Conscious Conversations often hit home and aren’t always an easy hit but as Ann says enough of the fluff, this a a place for in depth conversations that will make a difference in the lives of women. I highly recommend going to www.womantalklive.com to check it out.

My monthly article is titled Sharing Words with Friends. The idea comes simply from my love of words and how certain words make me feel. In June I talked about my favorite word, gentle and in July the word embrace. I’ll add a spoiler here and tell you that I’m working on the word resilient for August.

In the July article, ow.ly/PCyvs,I discuss embracing a person, idea, opportunity and embracing the day. It ends with this:

When I imagine embracing the day I feel empowered and thankful. Empowered knowing that I can handle what the day brings and thankful for another day–the people, opportunities and ideas that I choose to embrace.

Sounds like a wonderful concept, right? And most days it is.

Since Write to Survive is my blog, I’m not a guest here, I’m going to be completely open and tell you that embracing the day is not working right now! Even on the mornings when I think the words, I don’t feel one bit empowered. I’m stuck in one of those nonproductive funks that feels like quicksand! I know you can relate. We all experience periods like this, when we know what we need to do but can’t seem to do it.

The funk is usually generated from feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or worried, from a lack confidence or all of the above. Instead of feeling empowered you feel powerless. Days pass when the important things you need to accomplish go untouched. The more days that pass the worse you feel.

I think I have a solution. Use visualization to have a “conscious conversation” with yourself. Visualize sitting in a cafe with your best friend sipping your favorite coffee or tea. Have “your friend” tell you all the things that are blocking her from being productive as you write them down. Next take some time to think about the advice you would give her. Once again visualize meeting back up at that cafe. Advise “your friend” on what she needs to do to get out of the quicksand and on a forward path. Now let it all sink in.


Most of us are very good at articulating what is best for a relative or friend and terrible at heeding our own advise. So become your own best friend and have that conscious conversation about what is blocking you and what you can do to move forward.

I need to make some decisions on how I want to proceed with the marketing of my book, Say It Out Loud, and for a variety of reasons, which “my friend” will tell me later, I can’t get started. Over the next couple of days I’m going to try and take the advice I’m giving you, write down my concerns, provide suggestions and see if that will pull me out of my quicksand.

If you are sharing the quicksand with me, give it a go. Let me know how visualizing being your own best friend works. And just in case I’m unsuccessful feel free to share your strategies here for getting unstuck! Best Wishes, Roberta



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